Wednesday, September 26, 2012

What does biblical friendship look like?


John 13:1–17
            13Now before the festival of the Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart from this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. 2The devil had already put it into the heart of Judas son of Simon Iscariot to betray him. And during supper 3Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going to God, 4got up from the table, took off his outer robe, and tied a towel around himself. 5Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was tied around him. 6He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?” 7Jesus answered, “You do not know now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” 8Peter said to him, “You will never wash my feet.” Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no share with me.” 9Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!” 10Jesus said to him, “One who has bathed does not need to wash, except for the feet, but is entirely clean. And you are clean, though not all of you.” 11For he knew who was to betray him; for this reason he said, “Not all of you are clean.” 12After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, “Do you know what I have done to you? 13You call me Teacher and Lord—and you are right, for that is what I am. 14So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you. 16Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them. 17If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them.


            Years ago we lived in the town of Livingston and I served three small rural churches (most of my parishioners were dairy farmers.) At that time I started a program that I called “physical visitation” where I would lend myself out for a day to help on somebody’s farm.
            I figured out right away that nobody was going to let me touch their cows; the cows were literally the farmer’s “bread and butter” which meant that they were way too important to leave in the care of an amateur like me but I did get a chance to do a lot of other things like shoveling out silos and cleaning the aisle and the gutter in the barn (which in a dairy barn is where all of the stuff you don’t want gets collected…the stuff that can give a dairy barn it’s unique fragrance.)

            In most dairy barns there are automated systems that move the manure from the barn to a storage facility (because later the manure gets spread on the field; I got to do that too) but there is still some scraping and spraying that needs to be done to keep things as clean as possible.
            I’m guessing that even for dairy farmers, cleaning the aisle and the gutter is not high on their list of “things I like to do,” but it is a job that needs to be done and it doesn’t take a lot of skill so it is often a job given to the kids or to the new pastor.

            I don’t really know if my “physical visitation” program had any impact on these parishioners BUT it had an impact on me. I learned a lot about farming and I got better acquainted with the people I was SUPPOSED TO BE ministering too.
            In terms of the work I was doing, I don’t know if it was a “good” experience for these farmers but I can say that it was a “good” experience for me. Doing “grunt” work all day and coming home smelling like the barn gave me a whole different perspective on my life. Everyone should spend some time in the barn.

            This morning we are talking about ACTS OF HUMILITY and cultivating friendships.

            In this passage from John 13 we are talking about a similar teaching experience. Jesus and his disciples had gathered in an “upper room” in order to eat the Passover meal together and in the middle of this meal Jesus got up and began to wash his disciples’ feet. This was an important lesson for them and an important lesson for us.
 “Do you know what I have done to you? 13You call me Teacher and Lord—and you are right, for that is what I am. 14So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you.  John 13:12-15

            In the church we have always had a tendency to be enamored by what Jesus said and did. That’s as it should be, but what this has meant is that we have had a tendency to try to replicate or duplicate the events THAT JESUS WAS A PART OF. It’s kind of like a game of spiritual “follow the leader.” Again, this is not a bad thing, it’s just that if we aren’t careful we will follow the actions and miss the point.

            Jesus washing his disciples’ feet is one of those events that we have felt like we should replicate some how and so, over the years I’ve floated the idea of having a foot washing ceremony (usually) as a part of our Maundy Thursday WORSHIP celebration AND what I’ve discovered (and fairly quickly) is that people in this part of the world really don’t want anyone doing anything with their feet. They will let you wash their hands, they might even let you wipe off their faces but anything to do with the feet seems to be off limits.
            I don’t know what it is about feet. Maybe we’re just embarrassed by dry skin and toenail fungus. Maybe we spend so much time covering them in socks and shoes that we don’t like to show them off. Maybe it’s just because it tickles.

            But to be honest about it, trying to incorporate a foot washing ceremony into a worship service might be one of those examples of trying to follow so closely that we miss the point.

            In Jesus’ day, foot washing wasn’t an act of worship, it was really much more mundane. People didn’t have lots of fancy footwear and they either walked barefooted or they wore simple sandals. What this meant was that people’s feet were always dirty.
            When you were a guest in someone’s home it was normal for them to offer you a chance to wash your feet OR to wash your feet for you. They were doing this to welcome you. This was all about hospitality. When one person did it for others, it was considered a menial task of service; something you did (not because you liked it, but) because you cared.
            So, when Jesus took off his outer robe and began to wash his disciples feet it could have been interpreted by them as an act of common hospitality but the disciples understood it to be a task that might be assigned to a servant (kind of like cleaning the AISLE AND THE gutters) and the conversation that Jesus had with his disciples is pretty clear that this was, indeed, a lesson in humility and service.

            It may have been that Jesus thought his disciples needed a very clear (and powerful) lesson on what makes a person “great.” In Luke’s rendition of the story of the Last Supper there was a point during the meal where the disciples began to argue about who would be the greatest. This could have been that exact moment when Jesus got up from the meal, wrapped a towel around his waist, and began to wash their feet.
            When you look at this event in the context it is fairly clear that JESUS wasn’t SAYING, “WASH EACH OTHER’S FEET.” Aside from the fact that we have some sort of toe phobia, washing someone’s feet WOULD BE way TOO EASY; a little water, a soft towel and we’re done.

            What Jesus WAS SAYING WAS “SERVE EACH OTHER.” Don’t think of yourself as better than someone else. Don’t begin to think that other people are beneath you or that getting your hands dirty for God’s Kingdom is other people’s work. Washing someone’s feet would be easy. Serving each other is HARD but we have been called to do the “hard” thing.

            I’ve said the same thing about the Lord’s Prayer. I DON’T BELIEVE THAT JESUS was saying THAT WE SHOULD PRAY THE LORD’S PRAYER. He didn’t say, “This is then what you should pray.” He SAID, “This is then how you should pray.”
“This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, 

                             +Matthew 6:9 (NIV)


            No matter how comforting the Lord’s Prayer is for us, we have to admit that MEMORIZING and reciting THE PRAYER IS relatively EASY. PRAYING TO A GOD WHO IS CREATOR, LORD, PROVIDER, COMFORTER, FORGIVER AND GUIDE REQUIRES much MORE FOCUS. It requires that we invest some of our heart in it AND we have been called to invest our hearts IN ALL THAT WE DO.

            This seems to be a common denominator in much of Jesus teaching. If your heart isn’t in it then (no matter how grandiose you make it) maybe you are doing it for the wrong reasons. Maybe it has no meaning. Maybe it is even a sin.
            What we are supposed to learn is that servant hood needs to be something that is an expression of who we are. Being a servant needs to be part of our spiritual DNA; written into the very fabric of our lives BUT IN ORDER FOR that to happen we have to become people who care.

            SO, WE are (once again) HAVING a conversation about what is going on INSIDE our hearts. We are talking about what drives us, about what motivates us, about what is at the core of all that we say and do.


            THE APOSTLE JOHN said,
23And this is his commandment, that we should believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. 1 John 3:23

            It seems according to John that love follows faith and that what we need to develop is a foundation of faith upon which our new (and radical) lives of sacrificial love can be built.

            When you listen to the liturgy of the traditional marriage ceremony it highlights this progression. When the rings are exchanged the bride and groom are both asked to say,
In token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love with this ring I thee wed.

            This happens to be what the Bible says. We give ourselves to our Savior and it changes our lives. Our faith becomes the rock upon which our love grows and is expressed.
            So, what Jesus is calling us to do is to “trust” HIM and in that act of surrender allow Jesus to transform our hearts; to make us into new people (with new motivations). He is asking us to trust him to make us into the kind of people who care about people.

            My theological bias is that I don’t think that this is something we are capable of doing on our own. First of all we come into the world “broken” (not bad or evil, but broken), which tends to make us self-focused and we learn to live out of our weaknesses.

            Then, we (in particular) spend way too much time living in a world that teaches us that the “ends justify the means” and that the only thing that matters is “the bottom line.” You and I are a product of a system that tells us everyday that the most important thing in life is to look good and have lots of money. This makes the message that Jesus proclaimed hard for us to embrace. It seemed like it was counter cultural in Jesus’ day; it is even more counter cultural today.

            What Jesus was showing ALL OF his disciples was that we can become people who love the lord our God with everything we have and then we can take that relationship out into the world and love the people around us sacrificially; even if it requires that we do something as mundane as wash people’s feet.

            My assumption is that if you and I are willing to embrace this new life in Christ and you and I are then learning to live out our love for the people around us then we won’t have any trouble finding friends.

            Or if you want to put this back into the terms of my “physical visitation” program we might say, “If you are willing to clean up their manure maybe you are the kind of person that they can trust with their cows.”

            Give yourself to Jesus, see yourself becoming a new person and let your new life touch the people around you. We might call this “cultivating” friendship.
            Becoming a friend of God should make you a good friend all the way around.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Equal Opportunity Friendships


John 15:9-16
9As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love. 10If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. 11I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete. 12“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 14You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father. 16You did not choose me but I chose you. And I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask him in my name.

James 2:14-23

14What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if you say you have faith but do not have works? Can faith save you? 15If a brother or sister is naked and lacks daily food, 16and one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and eat your fill,” and yet you do not supply their bodily needs, what is the good of that? 17So faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead. 18But someone will say, “You have faith and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I by my works will show you my faith. 19You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe—and shudder. 20Do you want to be shown, you senseless person, that faith apart from works is barren? 21Was not our ancestor Abraham justified by works when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? 22You see that faith was active along with his works, and faith was brought to completion by the works. 23Thus the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness,” and he was called the friend of God.


            Some weeks ago Julie and I drove to La Crosse to attend my 40th High School reunion. It was something that I was excited about but it was also something that created some anxiety for me. I knew that none of us would look just like we did 40 years ago and I was a bit worried that I wouldn’t recognize anyone and that they wouldn’t recognize me. I guess I was a bit afraid that I would spend the entire evening with strangers and, in many ways, that’s exactly what happened.

            I’ve decided that there is a special (and unique spot) in our lives for “old friends.” For the most part, old friends are people who share a certain (and very specific) part of our lives but the reality is that, after 40 years, those people who might have once been close are now practically strangers.
            40 years ago we were involved in the same things, we interacted with the same people. 40 years ago we spent a lot of time together. 40 years ago we had a lot in common but now 40 years later all we have in common are “old memories” and you could say that what we were doing on that Friday night was trying to re-establish friendships. We were taking steps to become friends again but it will always be hard when you don’t spend time together.

            This whole conversation about “friendship” is important because in this passage from John 15 we listen to a conversation that Jesus was having with his disciples the night before he died and in that conversation Jesus tied together the concepts of friendship, love and even the work of evangelism.
            This suggested to me that if we want to understand one of them we should try to understand all of them.
            In John 15:15 Jesus said to his disciples,
15I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father.

            The implication here is that “friends” are (by Jesus’ definition) people with whom we share the things that are the most important to us. Jesus was inviting his disciples into his life, into his ministry and into his plan for the transformation of the world. He opened up his life to them and he invited them to walk with him.
            We might say that real friends are people whom we hold emotionally and intellectually close. They are people who share our lives AND to a certain degree they are people who share our dreams.

            People who aren’t friends are people we hold at a distance. They might be familiar to us, we might recognize their faces when we see them on the street and we might even be “friendly” to them when we meet BUT we don’t share our lives with them, which means that they don’t really know us and we don’t really know them. I think the word we would use for them is “acquaintances.”

            Now, we should probably stop right here for a moment and reflect on what we’ve just heard. The question that all of us need to answer is,
Am I a friend of God or just an acquaintance?

            Have I been holding God at a distance or have I been willing to open my heart up and trust Jesus to love me, even after he has seen what drives my life? Does Jesus walk with me and do I walk with Him or is Jesus really more of a stranger to me? Am I a friend of God?
            This is an important transitional moment.
            What we have been proclaiming in the church for centuries is that God has invited us to be his children and his friends and if we decide to be a friend of the living God it will change our lives. That can happen right now. So, let that question run through you head for a moment.
Am I a friend of God?

            But we’re not done. In the same conversation that Jesus was having with his disciples he tied the words “friend” and “love” together. He said,
13No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

            I think what we’re seeing here is a progression of sorts because, if you remember, Jesus also taught that we are supposed to “love” our enemies:
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:43-45

            AND I think the practical reality is that we will never love our enemies if we haven’t learned to love our friends.
            So, we might say, in kind of a back door sort of way, that FRIENDSHIP IS GOD’S IDEA. He wants us to make and become friends because it allows us to give and receive real love AND then it teaches us how to “love our neighbors as we love ourselves.”
37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:37-40

            You might call this “discipleship school.” We are all taking steps to become real disciples.

            This also suggests that the reason why the love we see modeled in much of today’s society is ineffective is because it is “superficial” and “shallow” and we will always be tempted to accept this inferior approach to love for the real love that Jesus came to teach us BUT we must not go there.
            We are being asked to intentionally build relationships and to invite people into our lives. It is good for us and it should be good for them.

            THE CHURCH IS (then) MEANT TO BE A PLACE WHERE WE GROW TOGETHER AND BECOME FRIENDS. It’s not meant to be a weekly reunion where a bunch of strangers show up and rehash old memories. The Church is meant to be a place where we become ONE with each other and ONE with Christ.
28 There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28 (NIV)

            THIS IS not optional. This is what Jesus commanded us to do.
“This is my commandment that you love one another as I have loved you…” John 15:12

            But in order to fulfill Jesus’ command we need to SPEND TIME WITH EACH OTHER. We need to set aside time where we can SHARE THE THINGS THAT ARE IMPORTANT TO US. Which means that the church has to be more than just a worshipping community. The church needs to be a place where we share a common commitment and where we serve a common cause. The church needs to be a place for public confession and personal healing. The church needs to be about making and being friends.
            And we can do something about this. We can decide to invest more of our lives in this family of faith. We can stop attending and start investing ourselves in this particular body of believers. There should be something uniquely special about our home congregation because church is not simply about coming for the show; church is about growing together in love.

            We might call this “discipleship school.”


            There’s one last thing that Jesus tied into this discussion. He said,
“I appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last,”

            Our goal here is to become everything that God wants us to be. Our goal here is change people’s lives and in so doing change the world we live in. Our goal here is to nurture people in the faith and make new disciples of Jesus Christ.
            This transformation requires that we love and be loved which in turn requires that we learn to live as friends.

            Strangers don’t trust strangers. Which means that if we are going to help people hear the Good News of forgiveness and spiritual healing then they need to know us and we need to know them. They need to be willing to trust us and we need to genuinely care about them. This doesn’t happen overnight and this doesn’t happen without our being willing to make a commitment of our lives to building relationships with the people around us.

            We build friendships so we can give and receive love. Our love for people replicates the love that God has for us. People respond to our love by drawing close to the God who is working this transformation in our lives. People’s lives are changed and we make disciples and it starts with becoming friends.

            At midnight, a couple weeks ago, my cell phone rang and I jumped out of bed to answer it. I found myself talking to “Michael.” Michael sounded young, like a young teen. Michael was apparently just dialing numbers at random and hoping to get in touch with somebody. When I asked him who he was trying to reach he said, “You.” When I asked about the reason for his call he said that he was looking for a new friend.
            I told “Michael” that it was a bad time to call and he apologized and then hung up. The whole bizarre conversation lasted about a minute AND as I went back to bed I took a moment to pray for this voice named “Michael.”
            The saddest part for me was that Michael didn’t recognize that he couldn’t find a friend by calling random cell phone numbers AND, for the most part, friendship isn’t found on your “facebook” page or your “Twitter” feed AND it’s not even found by just showing up for this weekly gathering.
            Friendship is found in shared commitment; in spending time together; in learning to trust each other.

            This is a call to all of us to do whatever is necessary to create the time and space we need to build relationships with the people around us.
            WE SPEND TIME, WE BUILD FRIENDSHIPS, WE LEARN TO LOVE, WE SHARE THAT LOVE WITH THE WORLD AROUND US.

            We do this because Jesus told us too. We do this for the Michaels in the world.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Healthy Body, Healthy Spirit

Romans 5:1–5
5Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. 3And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.

1 Corinthians 9:24–27
24Do you not know that in a race the runners all compete, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win it. 25Athletes exercise self-control in all things; they do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable one. 26So I do not run aimlessly, nor do I box as though beating the air; 27but I punish my body and enslave it, so that after proclaiming to others I myself should not be disqualified.


1 Corinthians 6:20 (NIV)

20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

            The other day I had my semi-annual physical and I went through the standard routine. I started by stepping on the scale (which is generally the most depressing part of the whole experience for me) then I went in to the examination room and the nurse took my temperature and my blood pressure.
            After that the doctor came in and listened to my heart and my lungs, he thumped my chest and asked me to take deep breaths, he looked in my ears and down my throat , did a couple of other tests and then he sent me down to have my blood tested. The good news was that I had blood available for testing.

            I was kind of curious if working out three times a week for the past 6 months has had any measurable benefit on my health score and apparently it did.  My weight was down a bit, temperature was normal, pulse was good and blood pressure was acceptable. The other numbers (which were headed in the wrong direction) seem to have normalized a bit.
            The game isn’t over yet but it appears that all of the time I’ve been putting in at the health club is paying off, which is good motivation for continuing this program AND I can use all of the motivation I can get because it is easy to fail and hard to succeed.

            I know some people who would describe walking, running and strength training as “fun” activities. Personally, I have a hard time using the word “fun” because everything I do when I get to the health club hurts to some degree and there’s a name for people who like to hurt themselves. They are called “masochists.” I don’t like it, but there is a reason I do it.
            Pain is not really the issue because ultimately exercising isn’t really about whether or not it is “fun.” Exercising is about being as healthy as I can be, given what I have to work with. It’s about being faithful. It’s about being able to respond when I am called and go where I am sent. It’s about being the best servant of God that I can be.

            This is really a STEWARDSHIP CONVERSATION. God has called us to be good stewards of all that we have been given, which is more than just the air we breathe and more than just the water we drink.
            WE SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT STEWARDSHIP IS ALWAYS PERSONAL. it is about the things that really matter which is why the conversation always seems to come back to talking about where we spend our MONEY and how we use our TIME.

            Stewardship is about who we are, what we’ve been given, where we live and our responsibilities as followers of Jesus. In this context we need to say that GOD CARES ABOUT OUR BODIES and he wants US to care about our bodies as well.

            Theologically, we would say that our physical form is part of the creation that God described as GOOD; part of the creation that was broken by sin and part of the creation that Jesus came to redeem. We are not simply organic automatons that we can use and abuse and then toss aside.
            Theologically, there is something important about the “substance” of creation that we may not fully understand, but which stares us in the face every time we read the book. Our heaven, our future home, is described in physical terms. It is a place that has physical dimensions. It is a new earth and new city of God that has walls and streets; a place that is rooted in time and space. Heaven is not just clouds and fog. Heaven is this world (this universe) transformed into what it was always meant to be.
            What we’re saying is that GOD CARES ABOUT HIS CREATION which means that GOD CARES ABOUT OUR BONES and about how we treat or mistreat these bodies we live in every day.

            There are frustrations inherent in being good stewards of our bodies. Like in most things, CARING FOR OUR BODIES WILL BE EASIER FOR SOME PEOPLE AND HARDER FOR OTHERS.
            My parents came from the “life’s not fair” school of thinking and so I was reminded of that every day AND the older I’ve gotten the more I’ve seen that play true. WE have ALL known PEOPLE WHO NEVER exercise; who live on a steady diet of PORK RINDS AND BEER and they never gain even an ounce of excess weight. Some people can spend their whole lives in the sun and never wrinkle and never have a gray hair on their heads. The rest of us are eating soda crackers, going to the health club, taking vitamin D and using Grecian formula. It won’t ever be “fair” but that doesn’t change our responsibility.

            My mother used to tell me that I was “big boned.” That will never change but what I do with these “big bones” is up to me.
            There is another “stewardship” phrase that I think fits in here:
For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required…” Luke 12:48

            The general principles here are that we are called to care about what God cares about and God cares about us AND as God’s stewards; we are called to use what we’ve been given to give glory to God.

            We need to remember that this isn’t about outward appearance. As we get closer to Jesus we should be learning that GODLY BEAUTY ISN’T ALWAYS PRETTY. God sees us differently than we see ourselves and God is looking more for pretty souls than he is for pretty faces. God wants us to be PRETTY ON THE INSIDE and to have hearts that care about people. He wants us to have hearts that are being shaped by “humility,” “generosity,” “compassion” and “thanksgiving.” I believe that God wants us strong on the outside so WE CAN TAKE THE BEAUTY THAT IS ON THE INSIDE OUT into a world that desperately needs hope.
            This means that all the time I’m spending at the gym is more about “readiness” than it is about “appearances.”

            Now, I would be lying if I said that I didn’t want to look good. I’ve been trying for my entire life to learn to live with the person I see in the mirror and I’m not sure that I ever will, but ultimately I am not lifting weights just to impress SOMEBODY. I’m trying to prepare myself to be in service to this God to whom I owe everything.

            So, we are all called to live out this balance. We are physical creatures. We are also spiritual beings. We need to commit ourselves to caring for both our bodies and our relationship with God. Both are essential to our wholeness and both require our commitment. HEALTH AND GODLINESS BOTH REQUIRE SELF-DISCIPLINE.

The Apostle Paul made a reference to this challenge in his letter to the people in Corinth.
26So I do not run aimlessly, nor do I box as though beating the air; 27but I punish my body and enslave it, so that after proclaiming to others I myself should not be disqualified.  
1 Corinthians 9:26-27

            I’m not certain that I would use the word “punish” but what he is saying seems fairly clear. He didn’t want anything in his life to become an impediment to his ability to proclaim the Gospel. There is a certain amount of discipline required of us if we are going to be faithful servants.

            Health and Godliness both require that I put aside time to do what I need to do (which, in turn, means that I need to be willing to prioritize my life.) I can’t do everything, I can’t be everywhere, I can’t even accomplish everything I need to do, so I need to focus on the things that are important.
            Bible study, prayer, worship, fellowship and service are the building blocks of a strong spiritual life. Diet and exercise are the building blocks of a strong physical life. Paying attention to these components of wholeness will never be easy, but it will always be important.

            So we all have some decisions to make.

            When I was ordained I was asked one of the historical questions that John Wesley asked all of his preachers: “Are you going on to perfection?”  The correct answer was, “Yes, with God’s help.” What he meant was are you striving to be all that God wants you to be?” With God’s help, I am but it isn’t easy.

            I try to get to Anytime Fitness in New Berlin at least three times a week. It’s not as often as I would like, but it seems to be the most I can finagle for now. Recently, right next door to Anytime Fitness there opened a place called “The Frozen Ladle” which sells frozen yogurt and which they market as a low-fat alternative to ice cream (which it may, indeed, be) but their advertising actually says that we should all go there because it is good for us. I think that’s what we call (in the religion biz) “temptation.”

            I would like to be able to convince myself that the best thing I could do for my ministry (and the best thing I could do as a steward of God’s things) would be to skip the health club and spend my time at the “Frozen Ladle.” I think that would be a mistake.
            Maybe, sometime I’ll visit the “Frozen Ladle” but if I ever get to that point where I’m spending more time there than I am at Anytime Fitness I think it will be time to re-evaluate my life.

            Are you going on to perfection? Are you striving to be all that God wants you to be?
I think it is fair to say that God wants us to be growing spiritually and that God also wants us to be good stewards of everything we’ve been given which includes the bodies we live with every day.

            Are you going on to perfection? AND what are you going to do about it?

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Finding Confidence


Psalm 71:5–6
5For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
6Upon you I have leaned from my birth; it was you who took me from my mother’s womb. My praise is continually of you.

2 Corinthians 5:17–19
17So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new! 18All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation; 19that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting the message of reconciliation to us.


For my 9th grade graduation my parents said that I could buy a new suit so I picked out a baby blue with white pin stripes, double-breasted suit coat, which I wore with a white turtleneck, white pants and white crepe soiled shoes. It was all a bit pricey at the time but my dad told me that the only reason he said it was OK was because he wore a baby blue, white pin stripped, double breasted suit when he and my mom got married. Score one for nostalgia.

In 9th grade I was still struggling with issues around self-esteem and (as we’ve talked about in previous conversations) I was trying to find a place to belong BUT when I put on this particular outfit it gave me a whole new outlook on me. I thought the whole ensemble was pretty cool and by extension (when I was wearing that costume) I thought I was also “pretty cool.” I got almost “cocky.”

I have always heard people say, “Clothes make the man” and in this particular case it seemed to be playing true. When you put on a new suit it’s like seeing a new you (a you you’ve never seen before) and it carries over for a while. That is, until the new suit becomes an old suit.

I found out later that “Clothes make the man” is only the first part of that quotation. Mark Twain said, “Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.” He had a point.

The reality is that new clothes can help you see yourself in a new way but they are at best a temporary fix. PUTTING ON A NEW SUIT (OR a new DRESS) DOESN’T MAKE US A NEW PERSON…IT JUST COVERS UP THE PERSON WE are used to seeing in the mirror. It may work for a while but eventually the magic wears thin.

I am not the first person to have gone through this experience. I’m sure that retail sales have benefited over the years from people who were trying to find that perfect outfit; that cool suit coat; that temporary covering that would somehow make them look like the person they wanted to be.

And it’s not just clothes…we could expand this conversation a bit and talk about all of the other things that people try to hide behind. Alcohol, drugs, sex, violence, bigger houses, faster cars, more expensive jewelry (we could even throw religion into this mix) all of them have all been used by somebody in an attempt to hide from the person they live with every day.

The fundamental problem is that everything we try is only temporary. Each of them may work for a while but then the clothes get old, the alcohol wears off and the house needs a new roof.

What we need is something PERMANENT; something that works behind the surface at the core of who we are, something that works to fix the real problem. The Bible suggests that there is a brokenness in our lives that Jesus came to repair.

Paul said,
17So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new!

He was actually talking about a spiritual reconciliation. The word “reconcile” literally means to “change;” so Paul was talking about Jesus stepping into our lives and changing our relationship with God from being distant to being intimate.

But “reconcile” can also describe the change that takes place in our lives as we begin to see ourselves differently. Whatever impacts our souls should also impact the way we live. I believe that is why Jesus & Paul & John & James all talked about the natural connection between faith and good works
14What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? 17In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
James 2:14, 17

The Good News that we have been commissioned to proclaim is that Jesus came to heal the brokenness inside of our lives and that the healing he works inside us should spill out into everything we do and say.

The key to a new life is not a new suit. The key to a new life is a new “heart” and Jesus just happens to be in the new heart business.

If you look in the bulletin you will find that the title for this conversation is “Finding Confidence” and you might have been wondering if we we’re ever going to get to the confidence part. Well, here it is, but it is like dominoes falling down; a series of realizations (we might even call it a journey.)

We start with the realization that we are not what we should be OR not what we would want to be. We don’t know why we are so fragile but “fragile” might be just the word to describe THE CONDITION WE ARE IN (OF COURSE, WE DON’T’ WANT TO ADMIT IT…WE WANT TO BE “COOL” OR “TOUGH” OR “SMOOTH”…WE WANT TO THINK THAT WE’VE GOT IT ALL TOGETHER so we try to cover it up or fix it on our own.

Then we come to the realization that WE can’t fix it. Everything we try is only temporary AND IF WE HAVEN’T SCREWED OUR LIVES UP TOO BADLY in the process AND WE ARE STILL LISTENING we might realize that we need to turn to someone greater than ourselves (someone who has been chasing us down from the moment we were born. This is what we would call, in Wesleyan terms, “Prevenient Grace.”) God has always loved us and has been trying to get our attention. He wants to make us whole.

So, then if we are willing to surrender our lives to his control, Jesus begins to work a miracle deep inside our lives and we begin to see ourselves differently, which in turn changes the way we live our lives every day. We begin to find that we have a certainty that we are loved. We become convinced that Jesus has a hold on our hearts.

We begin to know that our God will care for us no matter what is happening to us or around us (confident that God is on our side and it doesn’t depend on how nice we look in photographs or what kind of suit we wear or how much money we have in the bank.)

 In fact, all of the things that we’ve filled our lives up with become less and less important and we begin to realize that all of those “things” are really resources (and opportunities) to make a difference in the world. Life is not about me alone, life is filled with moments when we can say a good word for Jesus and offer other people (people who are living suit to suit) a chance to meet this Jesus who heals broken hearts.

I think this is part of what Jesus was talking about when he said,
19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21

LAST WEEK I ended our conversation WITH THIS STATEMENT:
            Some time back we talked about Paul who was imprisoned for his faith in Jesus thanking God for the opportunity to tell the Roman guards about new life in Christ. Apparently, Paul had found something in his relationship with Jesus that gave him confidence that God was still in charge and this confidence provided peace for his soul.

Being a follower of Jesus is never just about a particular experience or a particular revelation or one moment in time. Being a follower of Jesus is a journey and one thing leads to another, which leads to another. We might call it “sanctification” OR we might call it “growing up” as followers of Jesus. One thing leads to another.

Our relationship with Jesus leads us to confidence in him (we might call it faith) which in turn leads to peace that passes understanding but is real in our lives every day.

JUST LIKE DOMINOES FALLING DOWN: RELATIONSHIP, CONFIDENCE, PEACE. It starts here.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Harnessing Stress


2 Corinthians 11:22-29
22Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they descendants of Abraham? So am I. 23Are they ministers of Christ? I am talking like a madman—I am a better one: with far greater labors, far more imprisonments, with countless floggings, and often near death. 24Five times I have received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. 25Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I received a stoning. Three times I was shipwrecked; for a night and a day I was adrift at sea; 26on frequent journeys, in danger from rivers, danger from bandits, danger from my own people, danger from Gentiles, danger in the city, danger in the wilderness, danger at sea, danger from false brothers and sisters; 27in toil and hardship, through many a sleepless night, hungry and thirsty, often without food, cold and naked. 28And, besides other things, I am under daily pressure because of my anxiety for all the churches. 29Who is weak, and I am not weak? Who is made to stumble, and I am not indignant?

2 Corinthians 12:6-10

…if I wish to boast, I will not be a fool, for I will be speaking the truth. But I refrain from it, so that no one may think better of me than what is seen in me or heard from me, 7even considering the exceptional character of the revelations. Therefore, to keep me from being too elated, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me, to keep me from being too elated. 8Three times I appealed to the Lord about this, that it would leave me, 9but he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” So, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 10Therefore I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities for the sake of Christ; for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.


When I was a small child the summer was one long “play date.” We would play softball in the alley or go down to the river and fish. On hot days we would walk to the beach to swim or run through the sprinkler or organize a water balloon fight. We played marbles, we caught bugs, we built forts, we hiked down to the marsh or up to the bluffs.

I remember sitting on the sidewalk and studying the ants as they carried things in and out of their nest. I remember lying on my back in the grass and watching the clouds drift by. I don’t remember being worried about much or stressed by anything.

But, then I began to grow up and the world was filled with talk of nuclear war and bomb shelters and the end of the world. I remember asking my Dad if we were going to build a bomb shelter and all he said was, “If I’m going to die because of some bomb, I’m going to die sitting at my kitchen table.” That wasn’t very reassuring for me.

Then I started to notice people and noticed people noticing me (at least I thought they did) and I began to worry about how I looked or about how I fit in. It was at that point that I began to explore things like the Merry Marvel Marching Society. I was looking to belong but I was also looking for security.

I remember when they decided to change the age of majority to 18. Most of my friends were elated because it would allow them to drink legally. All I could think about was the responsibility of being an adult. All of a sudden I had to worry about things like insurance and car payments and being arrested for something (that’s what happens when you are raised by a cop.) I was getting older and my stress level was going up. Then it started to be about finishing school and holding down a job and supporting a family.

For many of us it just continued from there with office politics and recall elections and political campaigns. Now, it’s about civil war in Syria, the economic crisis in Europe and wondering if we’re ever going to be able to retire. Our lives are filled with worry and anxiety and stress.

But, this is not just my story. I’m assuming that this is your story as well.

A new survey by the American Psychological Association suggests “nearly one third of US adults are living with extreme stress, while half believe stress is damaging their relationships, health, and work output.”

Stress can lead to “memory problems, Inability to concentrate, moodiness, irritability or short temperedness, a sense of loneliness and isolation OR PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS like Aches and pains, Chest pain, rapid heartbeat and frequent colds. It can raise blood pressure, suppress the immune system, increase the risk of heart attack and stroke, contribute to infertility, and speed up the aging process. Long-term stress can even rewire the brain, leaving you more vulnerable to anxiety and depression.”

So, the question isn’t do we have stress? The question is HOW DO WE DEAL WITH STRESS?

MAYBE WE NEED TO GO BACK TO THAT TIME WHEN STRESS WASN’T SUCH A BIG DEAL. Maybe we need to become like little children. I know, it sounds like I’m talking about an episode from the “Twilight Zone” but I think the principle is sound.

WHEN WE WERE SMALL (if we were fortunate) WE LIVED IN AN ATMOSPHERE OF SECURITY.  We DIDN’T WORRY ABOUT FOOD, SHELTER, CLOTHING BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE WAS TAKING CARE OF those things FOR US and we trusted that they would come through. We were able to live in peace because someone bigger than us was making sure that we were cared for.

This is the principle that Jesus was talking about in the Sermon on the Mount when he said,

25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. 
26Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? 28And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, 29yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. 30But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? MATTHEW 6:25a, 26-30

The goal isn’t to recapture our childhood. The goal is to find a relationship with the One who is able to provide peace for us even in the midst of our complicated and stressful lives.

What I have been sent to remind you of is that our God (our personal God) is able to care for you. So, you can let go of your worries and fears and KNOW that God will work with you and in you to make things right.

Paul is an example of that child-like trust that triumphs over the worries of our lives. In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul listed a whole string of challenges that he had faced because of his commitment to Jesus: imprisonments, floggings, stonings, shipwreaks, bandits, hunger, thirst and on top of that he carried the “daily pressure” of his “anxiety for all the churches.”

28And, besides other things, I am under daily pressure because of my anxiety for all the churches. 29Who is weak, and I am not weak? Who is made to stumble, and I am not indignant? 2 Corinthians 11:28-29

Many people (maybe even “most” people) would have buckled under all of the kinds of challenges that Paul had faced AND many people would have responded by taking a big step away from God (whether because of guilt or out of anger — I guess it makes little difference), BUT apparently Paul responded to the challenges in his life by moving closer to the God who had called him, forgiven him and sent him out to proclaim Good News.

Because of that decision Paul’s relationship with God became richer and his confidence in God became stronger AND the stress in his life didn’t break him.

Like Paul, we have a choice. We can let the “stressors” in our lives move us away from God or we can allow our challenges to move us into the arms of God. We can either run from him or come home to him and allow him to comfort us and care for us.

The Good News is that in the presence of God there is HOPE AND PEACE AND STRENGTH. That’s why Paul was able to say,
10Therefore I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities for the sake of Christ; for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.  2 Corinthians 12:10

God’s love is unending and God’s grace is sufficient for all of the challenges we face in our lives. So, the spiritual prescription for people whose lives are filled with stress is to move closer to God.

I know that many times we (clergy) sound like we are needlessly repeating the same things over and over again AND I know that people have interpreted many of the things we keep pushing as just another set of unnecessary obligations BUT THAT’S BECAUSE MANY OF US HAVE NEVER COME TO UNDERSTAND THAT A RELATIONSHIP WITH THE LIVING GOD ACTUALLY WORKS TO CHANGE THE WAY WE LIVE OUR LIVES. We are offering an opportunity for ordinary people (like you and me) to find peace in a world filled with turmoil. We are PROCLAIMING THE GOOD NEWS that there is hope for healing our deepest pains in the presence of the living Jesus.

So, one more time I will suggest that we all need to spend more time…
            MEDITATING ON GOD’S WORD.
            Spending time in the scriptures REMINDS US THAT GOD IS ALWAYS WITH US AND he is able to GIVE US the COURAGE AND the STRENGTH we need TO ACCOMPLISH HIS work and his WILL in the world and be his people IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES (just like he did in the lives of Paul and Peter and Philip and John.)
            We also need to find time…
            TO BE ALONE WITH GOD
            In our world silence and solitude are in short supply and we need to find (or even create) times when we can meditate, pray and let God calm our hearts. Time with God IS ESSENTIAL TO OUR SPIRITUAL HEALTH AND for REJUVENATING our MINDS IN TIMES OF STRESS.

            And we need to begin to PRACTICE BEING THANKFUL no matter what it is we are going through. Thankfulness says that we believe God is still in charge and that he will take what we are facing and use it to make us better people and use it to make a difference in someone else’s life.

            Some time back we talked about Paul who was imprisoned for his faith in Jesus thanking God for the opportunity to tell the Roman guards about new life in Christ. Apparently, Paul had found something in his relationship with Jesus that gave him confidence that God was still in charge and this confidence provided peace for his soul.

            It is time for us to re-discover what it’s like to lie down on our backs in the grass and watch the clouds go by AND know that our Father loves us and he is taking care of everything we need.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Where Do We Get Self Worth?


Romans 5:8
8But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us.

Romans 8:37-39

37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.


            As a child I decided to join the “Huckleberry Hound Fan Club” which meant that I was an official fan of Huckleberry Hound. That’s about it. I got a membership card (which I STILL HAVE) and a button with Huckleberry Hound’s picture on it. I wrote MY NAME on the membership card (IN PENCIL) and I put it in my wallet. That’s about it.

            THEN at some point I also decided to become a member of the Merry Marvel Marching Society (Marvel Comics.) For a dollar they not only sent me a membership card but also a letter that read (in part)…
Congratulations, favored one!
From this day forth, you will stand a little straighter, speak a little wiser, and walk a little prouder.
You’ve joined the winning team!
Henceforth, you shall never march alone.
Thus, we welcome you to the fold with this sagacious admonition-FACE FRONT. You're one of us now. 'Nuff said!

            Along with that I got a button (which I still have) that says, “MAKE MINE MARVEL” and a record so I could learn the Merry Marvel Marching Society theme song, which I did:
You belong, you belong, you belong, you belong to the Merry Marvel Marching Society. March along, march along, march along to the song of the Merry Marvel Marching Society. If you growl, if you groan, and your star is nearly zero, do not howl, do not moan, you can be a superhero, marching right along to the fighting song of the Merry Marvel Marching Society.

            I listened to that record over and over and over again. I desperately wanted to feel good about myself. I didn’t need to be a superhero; I simply wanted someone to tell me that I was good enough to belong AND that’s what the Merry Marvel Marching Society did for me.

            It wasn’t life changing (not in the permanent sense) but it was a moment when I had some hope that I could be OK. AND as long as I stuck with my comic books and listened to the record it seemed to be working. But, even in the 60’s, a dollar could only go so far and the real world had (even then) a tendency to swallow us up. Eventually the button and the record went into a drawer and I went back to wondering if anyone really cared and if I would ever really be good enough to belong.

            I think it is kind of ironic (considering what I do for a living) that the church wasn’t that place. But it seemed to me (at the time) that we were just going through the motions…nothing seemed to apply to my life…it wasn’t my decision to be there. When I was confirmed they gave me a bible with my name on it (but up to that point I had never really read the bible and having one with my name on didn’t really change that.) I think I would have been happier with a button and a record. I know, now, that I should have come away from that experience with a deep sense of God’s love for me and I should have understood that I was part of a kingdom movement, a family of faith and the communion of the saints. But, the reality was that that didn’t happen.

GOD AFFIRMS US BY LOVING US UNCONDITIONALLY
            What I needed to hear was that I was uniquely special BECAUSE God said it was so AND that God loved me unconditionally. The sad thing is that maybe they did and I wasn’t listening but that means that they needed to say it over and over again until I understood like Paul said in his letter to the people in Rome.
Romans 5:8
8But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us.

            God didn’t wait for me to be good enough…he didn’t even wait for me to find him…he went through a process that would open the door for me so that I could become the person I was meant to be…he worked it out so that I could live with him and he could live IN me.

GOD MADE US, AND ALL HIS WORKS ARE WONDERFUL
            And once I was willing to take down the walls and let him into my life then he began to convince me that I was not some cosmic accident. My life has always been a part of his design, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”
Psalm 139:13-14
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

            The people who live around us in the world (and we ourselves) will always be tempted to see what is on the outside AND we will make judgments about people based on their height, weight, facial features, style of clothes and the car they drive. If we’re not careful we will get sucked into that way of thinking and most of us will come up short. We will never have enough stuff and we will never be pretty enough or handsome enough.

            What we are meant to learn is that God sees us differently.
There is a story in the Old Testament about the selection of David as King of Israel to replace Saul. The prophet Samuel was called by God to go to the home of Jesse because one of his sons was going to be the new king. So Jesse lines the boys up from oldest to youngest and parades them past Samuel. It says, in 1 Samuel 16…
1 Samuel 16:6-7
6When they came, he (Samuel) looked on Eliab and thought, “Surely the Lord’s anointed is now before the Lord.” 7But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

            The Lord does not see as mortals see. He knows us. He sees us as precious. He was willing to come and live with us and die for us so that we could know how precious we really are.

            So, where does our self-esteem come from? Where do we find self-worth?
            The answer is that we find our hope and our joy and our peace in the PRESENCE of the living God.
            The Merry Marvel Marching Society didn’t really work because it was all made up; it was a fantasy. I didn’t need an alternative universe to try to live in…I needed the living God to step into my universe and live with me HERE and begin to change the way I saw myself, the people around me and the world that I lived in.
            Confirmation didn’t work for me because I needed someone to introduce me to this living God who was able to truly make my life a marvel. I learned facts and dates and the answers to specific questions but I didn’t learn to love Jesus or to be loved by Jesus.
           
            The real wonder of this movement we call Christianity is that it is centered on a relationship with a living God who is able to take ordinary people and give them a new heart so that they learn to love sacrificially and new eyes so that they begin to see the world (and themselves) in a new way.

            Where does our self-esteem come from? Where do we find self-worth?
            First, it is a journey. It doesn’t happen overnight but it is a journey that begins when we are willing to tear down the walls that keep us at a distance from God and then invite him in to be the LORD of our lives.
            The Gospel could be as simple this: You have been invited to belong to a family as old as time. You invited into a Kingdom that is working to redeem the world. You are being invited to come close to a God who sees you as precious as you are. You can become a new person through trusting in Jesus. That journey can begin today.

            Here are some suggestions for things that you might do to begin that journey to new life:
                        First, work on developing your INNER BEAUTY.
                                    SPEND TIME WITH GOD and GET TO KNOW THE ONE WHO LOVES YOU.

LEARN TO PRAY. Learn to open your heart to the living God who loves you and wants to be at work in you AND through you.

LEARN TO REFLECT ON WHAT GOD HAS SAID. Learn from his wisdom. Take your bible off of the shelf and make it a living part of your life.

SPEND TIME WITH THE BEAUTY OF GOD’S CREATION and BE REMINDED THAT GOD DOESN’T MAKE “JUNK.”

FOCUS ON YOUR ABILITIES NOT ON YOUR WEAKNESSES and then learn to USE YOUR GIFTS TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN SOMEONE ELSE’S LIFE.

One step at a time you will begin to know that you belong, you belong, you belong, you belong. God is calling you home.